Since starting medication I have not done any creative writing. I started meds in 2009. Before that I had one story published in an anthology. It has always been my dream to be a writer/painter but it seems like that has been taken away. I feel no creativity anymore and it used to come so easily. When I try to paint nothing comes out even partially right. It's as if I've never painted before. Has anyone else experienced this? I think this is one of the reasons when I was diagnosed I felt as if I really lost myself. Things I thought were real for 17 years were no longer real. I began to like different foods. My passions in life were gone. My outlet in writing vanished. My drive wiped out.
I've been having hypnagogic (sp?) hallucinations. This is when you experience hallucinations while waking up or falling asleep. It's not related to schizophrenia and apparently 37% of the populations has them. This makes me wonder why no one talks about them. Is there so much stigma around hearing voices and seeing things that a disorder that affects 37% of the population can't be discussed? Mine has been minor things from hearing voices to more serious things like seeing a man in my bedroom. That one was scary b/c I really thought it was real.
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