Recovery?

Why do people use the word recovery when talking about Schizophrenia? You don't recover you just dull the effects with meds. How long will the meds work? No one knows. You could be fine for months then all of a sudden have a hallucination. It's a roller coaster. And mood. I never know what my mood will be when I get up in the morning. Will I be able to get up and get a few chores done, or will I be unable to even get myself in the bath.
My GP the first day I met her referred to me as recovered and asked me when I would be getting back to work. I sat there mute unable to come up with something to say. BTW she seems to think volunteering is not work. She always wants to know when I'm going to be paid. A normal paid job is just the amount of stress I need to start hallucinating again and shoot my anxiety way up. She doesn't understand these things-she doesn't understand much. At my last paid job I began crying uncontrollably everyday in front of management until eventually they would not allow me back. I just snapped and couldn't take it any more. I missed shifts b/c I couldn't bear to go in. I lost the reality of paycheck=home. I told my former dr. this and she got me disability for generalized anxiety disorder. She had no idea I was actually schizophrenic. I was obviously in denial about it b/c I did not hear 'crazy voices' I heard angels. I never told her about that.
I have no idea who reads this blog, but it made me feel good to write two tonight when I can't sleep.